I was hopeful, but the article left quite a lot to be desired. Before I go any further, I want to applaud the dancers who spoke out. It needs to become more commonplace for dancers to use their voices. You should feel empowered to speak out against the wrongs you experience whether they’re directed towards you or those around you. Be a champion for yourself and others.

For me, one of the most disturbing lines in the piece came quite early, when the author explained that weight can, “interfere with a seamless, sculptural quality.” Thus distorting line. This article was about the ballet body as it pertains to those in the professional realm of dance. When dancers are training at a professional or pre-professional level, the shape of their bodies will be “seamless” and “sculptural”. Lines will be clear, beautiful and aesthetically pleasing because muscles are shaped by ballet.

Even if the body itself is larger, the shape of the muscles will achieve the desired line.

Ballet bodies based on the number on the scale…

An unfortunate and triggering aspect of the NYT article was the sharing of dancer weight by the numbers and how the number has changed over the course of the pandemic. It shared a very small weight change. Many dancers have experienced a much more significant shift in weight. Dancers have gained weight due to the change in activity level, food consumption, stress, emotional eating, or any combination of those factors or others.

If your body has changed, it’s ok. You don’t have to fear weight gain.

What’s healthy for you? Be honest.

“Appropriately, Kathryn Morgan’s recent experience at Miami City Ballet was included. Kathryn said, “I went in — full, open disclosure — saying I have this particular condition,” she said in an interview. “This is how my body is. I am not ever going to be the smallest one onstage.”

“Once she arrived, her body was constantly criticized.

There needs to be a shift wherein Artistic Staff at a company are willing to accept dancers when the dancers themselves know they’re at their personal best. If you say, this is me at my healthiest, that’s where your company should want you to stay.

Your body is a ballet body…

One of my favorite contributions to the article came from former Miami City Ballet dancer, Chloe Freytag. She said, “You can have insane stamina, powerful strength and a really different looking body than somebody else next to you who has the same stamina and the same strength. I do think we can change the standard of how we identify a qualified dancer.”

Amen.

When you’re at your personal best, you can feel it. However, it’s not likely to look like the personal best of the dancer next to you.

Schools are not “protective bubbles”.

The writer said that once you go pro, the protective bubble of school fades. I wish dance schools were protective bubbles. It would be so beautiful if they provided a positive environment for self-acceptance and growth. Some do. So many do not.

To start to reform ballet, why not go to schools first? Remove the school directors and teachers who perpetuate damaging messages. Parents can support this change by removing their children from schools that don’t let go of the dated, destructive approach to body shape and size.

No comments in passing…

I really appreciated the contributions from New York City Ballet Artistic Directors Wendy Whelan and Johnathan Stafford. It’s useful to see how one of the biggest companies in the world plans to make adjustments. Concerns will no longer be brought up in passing. So often, dancers are told in very nonchalant, mindless ways that something has changed and is no longer “acceptable” about their bodies.

If there’s concern about a dancers well-being due to changes in their body, it’s reasonable to have a supportive conversation. What shouldn’t happen is shaming, loss of roles, or accusations. Why not approach changes from a place of curiosity? You could say, “We’ve noticed some changes. Is everything ok?”

If you struggle to accept your body in dance, you’re not alone.

One thing was surely clear: few are immune to the aesthetic body pressures in dance. To hear from dancers at the top of the field confirms that these insecurities run deep. Body pressure is ingrained in dance culture. Even the dancers you might assume have no worries, worry about this.

For more thoughts on this article, check out this video where I get into all the little details including some thoughts on how to move forward in a productive way.

The post “What Is a Ballet Body?” appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

When a Friend is Being Negative

We’ve all been there…innocently warming up for class and a friend unleashes hatred; onto herself.

She’s looking in the mirror and starts to pick apart her body and appearance. She says her butt has grown since last season or her thighs are clearly bigger.

Is this fishing for compliments? Looking for validation? Perhaps. It’s totally possible she’s just looking for you to tell her she’s fine. Or that she looks the same or better or at least “good”.

It’s also possible that she’s hoping you’ll chime in with some self-loathing of your own. Maybe she’d feel better if you start talking about what has gotten “bigger” or “less toned” on your own body.

This situation is hard to navigate and it’s hard to know what the best way to respond might be. You can watch this video for some ideas, or if you prefer, read on!

Try sharing with your friend how you deal with your own body image insecurities.

For example, try saying, “instead of focusing on a perceived flaw, I try to think about how my body is serving me”. Share how your negativity makes you feel and how you cope with it. That might help her see how to flip things to a positive.

It might also help to let her know how you feel when surrounded by negativity. Let her know that those negative comments make you feel helpless and you’re unsure how to help her turn it around.

You want your friends to be able to talk to you when they’re going through hard times. You might encourage her to come to you for support rather than venting or getting lost in negativity.

This might be a friend you’ll end up needing some space from.

It’s hard to stay positive when you have a friend who’s constantly focused on what’s going wrong. It’s totally acceptable to take space from people who are making it hard for you to live your best life.

Maybe you can help your friend to see the positive. Ask her, “what’s something about your body or your dancing that you love?” Remind her that she’s not alone and that there are also plenty of positives to focus on.

Don’t internalize your friends negativity or project it onto yourself. Don’t compare your body to hers. This is a big one! If a friend is complaining about her body and you view her body as “ideal” it’s normal to get lost in comparison.

When those thoughts come up, put the focus on your gifts and encourage her to do the same. Come back to gratitude. Your body allows you to dance! When you take care of your body and mind, you’ll be able to show up more fully and do your best dancing.

Find the light. Find your positivity. Focus on what’s going well.

Remind yourself what’s going well with a gratitude list. Simply write down 3 things you’re grateful for and remember that you have a lot of good stuff going on in your life. Even in trying, uncertain times it’s possible to find something positive to focus on.

The only person whose approval you need is your own.

When you approve of yourself, your confidence will soar!

In Conclusion…

Everyone is on their own journey. Each of us has to learn life lessons on our own. As much as you might be focused on the positive side of life, you can’t force your friend to do the same. If you’re committed to growing and improving as a dancer, maintaining body positivity will be a game changer.

One of the biggest things dancers struggle with is confidence. If you can work towards body positivity and remind yourself about what’s going well, you’ll have the potential to grow your confidence exponentially. Don’t discount the value of seeing your own worth.

If you’re struggling to stay body positive, check out this post: How to Create a Positive Relationship with Food and Your Body

The post How to Stay Body Positive in Dance appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

When you rewrite your body story and work to believe the new story you’ve created, you’ll feel empowered. You’ll start to see that even if someone else has a preference that your body doesn’t happen to fit into, it’s OK. You can find a place that celebrates and supports your unique shape, movement quality, and love for dance–come on, that’s what it should be about!! Those are the dancers who shine.

More often than not, I take my dancer clients through the process of rewriting their body stories. The power in reframing the context of your experience is immeasurable. 

Kathryn Morgan’s recent share about her experience with body shame and criticism while dancing at Miami City Ballet, highlights the importance of taking back the power. You get to write your body story, no one else.

Where our “stories” come from…

Your body story started forming when you were quite young. For some, it begins as young as five or six years old as you notice the world around you. People say things, perceptions form. It might be hard to remember a body memory from that young of an age, in which case, your earliest memory is a good place to start.

I’ve often shared where my body image issues began (for full details on that, read more here). I was thirteen and had just returned from my first Summer Intensive away. My main teacher at my home studio tapped me on the thigh before class and declared, “that wasn’t there before.” From that moment on, I was pretty obsessed with diets and always thought I should be smaller. I thought losing weight was imperative to becoming the best dancer I could be.

So think back…what’s the earliest memory you can remember that started to shape your perception of yourself or what a body in dance should be? Write it down. From there, think about all the comments you heard over the years. Write down all the comments you remember whether they were directed towards you or a group.

It can be painful to recount all the experiences you’ve had that made you feel badly about your body, but facing them is going to help you move on and rewrite your story.

Gathering evidence to back them up.

From those first body feedback experiences, you start to gather evidence to back up that negative perception you’ve created. So when you don’t do well in an audition you’ll revert to the thought, “it’s because of my thighs, just like Nadia said.” 

You start to use each bad audition or casting experience as evidence that your body is not good, too big, or just not right for dance. When you stay in that mindset, you won’t be able to support yourself with positivity, optimism, and possibility.

What’s worse: when you get positive feedback you’ll find a way to discount it. 

Research shows that we have a built in “negativity bias.” It’s much easier to focus on and remember negative experiences than positive ones. This is why rewriting your story to focus on all the good is essential. Even more important: you need to give yourself reminders throughout the day that there’s lots of good potential and positive things to focus on.

Rewrite your story.

Think about all the positive feedback you’ve received over the years. Just like you did with the negative, try to remember your earliest memories. Were you good at staying in line as one of those party kids in the Nutcracker? Did a teacher compliment you on your tendus when you were 8?

In addition to the actual positive comments, write down memories of teachers who were particularly encouraging, positive, and supportive. Who saw your potential and made you feel like you could succeed and achieve your dance goals? Go into as much detail around these memories as you can.

Once you’ve compiled all your positive memories, bring in some imagination and creativity. Go back to your experiences as a young dancer and rewrite them in your memory with only the good. Erase the negative experiences from the paper and your memory. What would it have looked like if you only had positive, supportive experiences? How would you feel? Would your approach to auditions, company class, and casting be different?

Keep coming back to your new body story.

Since we’re hardwired for negativity, you’ll have to come back to your new, positive body story each and every day. Maybe you read it every morning or take it with you in a journal when you go to auditions. 

Confirm for yourself–the positive is your truth. You get to choose what you believe. Believe the good, and trust the people who encouraged you along the way. The naysayers are usually projecting their own pain and negativity onto you anyway. Forgive them and let them go–their pain is not your responsibility.

What if you don’t rewrite your story and take the negative feedback as fact?

This is when people quit, burn out, or lose their passion for dance. It’s why my career ended in my late 20’s instead of continuing until I was truly ready to say goodbye to ballet. 

The body negativity will tear you down if you let it—it might take months or years, depending on the situation.

Rewrite your story so you can see all the good you have to offer as a dancer, an artist, a human.

Interested in working with me to reach your body goals, find unshakeable body confidence, and rewrite your body story for good? Apply for Elite Best Body Coaching.

The post Rewrite Your Body Story appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

from a Man in Ballet

Asher Taylor-Dawson shared some incredibly insightful thoughts on the dancers’ body in The Whole Dancer Facebook Group. I asked him to expand upon his ideas for this post. I hope that his perspective will be supportive to those pursuing dance at a pre-professional and professional level. How will you define your best body?

A spark: defining “best body.”

Recently, Jess opened a Facebook group discussion with the question, “What does ‘dancers’ personal best body’ mean to you?”

I was ready for this: as a dancer and as a teacher, I think about that all the time. Right off the bat, I replied: 

“The body that works the best: the one that feels good, can move freely, can execute technique effectively. One that is tired enough at the end of the day to sleep well without being so tired that it’s already cooked upon waking.”

Even before I hit “reply” though, I knew that my answer wasn’t the whole truth. And I had to ask myself why? Why did writing the whole truth feel like stepping onto a minefield?

Form follows function.

I suppose I should begin with the rest of the truth.

I’m a muscular guy with close-set hip, and a dancer in a ballet company with a mostly-classical repertoire. Too much muscle or fat on my thighs makes it harder to achieve the really tight fifth and crossed fourth positions that underpin so much of classical technique.

In short, because of the way my pelvis is constructed, my legs can only be so big before they get in their own way. Anyone whose legs are set a bit farther apart than mine won’t have the same problem.

Therefore, for me, the whole truth includes the caveat, “…and my personal best body has to remain within certain size constraints, for functional purposes.”

When I put it that way, of course, it’s suddenly clear why saying it the first time felt a bit dangerous.

Too often, as dancers, we experience immense pressure, spoken or unspoken, conscious or not, to be smaller, thinner — to fit ourselves into an ultra-lean aesthetic that is, for most of us, unsustainable. And any time size comes up, even in a case like mine, it touches that nerve.

What happens when form gets the upper hand?

There are so many dancers — especially women — of different sizes and shapes whose artistry and technical prowess should be more than enough to earn them their place in the studio and on the stage. 

Yet, the predominant aesthetic in our art form routinely pushes so many of them to the margins or even right out of ballet. They’re seen as “too fat” or “too muscular.” As children, they find themselves tucked away in the back of the Nutcracker’s party scene; as adults, if they can find work, they may be told outright to lose weight.

Most humans can’t be as lean as ballet’s current aesthetic demands and still perform grueling feats of physical dexterity. We’ve been fed the message that if we can’t, we don’t belong in ballet. Worse, the message is bred into our bones, so we hear it from inside, where perhaps it hurts us the most.

Images of great dancers from the past, however, might surprise us. Nijinsky was famously stocky and short-legged. Marie Taglioni was built a bit like a gymnast. Even such legendary ballerinas as Pavlova and Fonteyn seem robust compared to many of today’s slight sylphs and wiry wilis. 

Though aesthetics always influence art, we remember these icons of dance not because of how their bodies looked, but because of what those bodies could do.

In any living art form, technique and aesthetics must, by definition, evolve. We evolved towards a lean, wiry aesthetic — but we can also evolve away from it.

Function and form can be partners.

There remains, of course, the argument that women in ballet should be light so the men can lift them. I feel rather vulnerable saying this so starkly here in a very public setting, but I feel it still needs to be said: if ballet requires women to starve so men can lift them, ballet needs to change.

As a male ballet dancer, I see it as my job to be strong enough to lift my partner. Not her job to be light enough for me to lift.

There are limits, of course. There will always be limits. Great artists, by definition, learn to transcend limitations.

This shouldn’t mean starving female-identified dancers, though. Instead, choreographers and dancers can work together to evoke an image or mood by harnessing biomechanics. We can swap an overhead press lift, where strength is key, for a dynamic lift to a shoulder, where momentum can help. Or we can use any number of other lifts.

To the audience, either one looks like magic — and isn’t that really the point? To create that magic, we have to be healthy and strong. That will look different for each of us, which might mean a very different aesthetic will develop But put us all together, each at our own best, and I suspect that we’ll have something beautiful, and that ballet will emerge renewed.

Asher Taylor-Dawson is a dancer at The Lexington Ballet Company in Lexington, KY, a teacher of ballet and modern dance, and a founding member of Antiphon, a small contemporary ballet company, where he focuses on creating works on diverse dancers across the spectrum of size, shape, and age, using traditional and non-traditional approaches to partnering. Born in raised in Connecticut, he lives in Louisville, KY with his husband, Denis, and their cat.

The post Body Thoughts From A Man In Ballet appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

Also, it’s important to me that you know I think the #1 thing to consider when choosing what leotards, tights or skirts to wear is how they make you feel. If something makes you feel confident, happy or inspired – wear it! If something makes you feel beautiful – wear it!

Don’t let anyone dictate what you can or cannot wear.

These tips are just some things to keep in mind. After you watch this video you might notice that a leotard you’ve never really enjoyed wearing could be a cut or style that’s not the best on your body type. That’s totally ok – take it as a sign that you should give it away, trade, or sell it.

There’s no reason to keep leotards, clothes, or anything really that doesn’t bring you joy and make you feel good. You might find you’re happier if you just keep the leotards that make you feel confident even if it means having less of them. Personally I’d rather have 5 leotards I love vs. 30 leotards that make me unhappy.

After I retired from dance I got rid of most of my leotards – something I’ve come to regret since I’m now dancing again. However, it did give me the opportunity to rebuild my collection from scratch and to only buy leotards that are more flattering to my shape.

How many leotards are in your collection? Do you prefer a specific style over another? What about materials? Do you find some materials more flattering than others? Share in the comments. I’d love to hear what your preferences around leotards are and how you’ve come to that conclusion!

The post Dressing for your body type in ballet. appeared first on The Whole Dancer.