When you rewrite your body story and work to believe the new story you’ve created, you’ll feel empowered. You’ll start to see that even if someone else has a preference that your body doesn’t happen to fit into, it’s OK. You can find a place that celebrates and supports your unique shape, movement quality, and love for dance–come on, that’s what it should be about!! Those are the dancers who shine.

More often than not, I take my dancer clients through the process of rewriting their body stories. The power in reframing the context of your experience is immeasurable. 

Kathryn Morgan’s recent share about her experience with body shame and criticism while dancing at Miami City Ballet, highlights the importance of taking back the power. You get to write your body story, no one else.

Where our “stories” come from…

Your body story started forming when you were quite young. For some, it begins as young as five or six years old as you notice the world around you. People say things, perceptions form. It might be hard to remember a body memory from that young of an age, in which case, your earliest memory is a good place to start.

I’ve often shared where my body image issues began (for full details on that, read more here). I was thirteen and had just returned from my first Summer Intensive away. My main teacher at my home studio tapped me on the thigh before class and declared, “that wasn’t there before.” From that moment on, I was pretty obsessed with diets and always thought I should be smaller. I thought losing weight was imperative to becoming the best dancer I could be.

So think back…what’s the earliest memory you can remember that started to shape your perception of yourself or what a body in dance should be? Write it down. From there, think about all the comments you heard over the years. Write down all the comments you remember whether they were directed towards you or a group.

It can be painful to recount all the experiences you’ve had that made you feel badly about your body, but facing them is going to help you move on and rewrite your story.

Gathering evidence to back them up.

From those first body feedback experiences, you start to gather evidence to back up that negative perception you’ve created. So when you don’t do well in an audition you’ll revert to the thought, “it’s because of my thighs, just like Nadia said.” 

You start to use each bad audition or casting experience as evidence that your body is not good, too big, or just not right for dance. When you stay in that mindset, you won’t be able to support yourself with positivity, optimism, and possibility.

What’s worse: when you get positive feedback you’ll find a way to discount it. 

Research shows that we have a built in “negativity bias.” It’s much easier to focus on and remember negative experiences than positive ones. This is why rewriting your story to focus on all the good is essential. Even more important: you need to give yourself reminders throughout the day that there’s lots of good potential and positive things to focus on.

Rewrite your story.

Think about all the positive feedback you’ve received over the years. Just like you did with the negative, try to remember your earliest memories. Were you good at staying in line as one of those party kids in the Nutcracker? Did a teacher compliment you on your tendus when you were 8?

In addition to the actual positive comments, write down memories of teachers who were particularly encouraging, positive, and supportive. Who saw your potential and made you feel like you could succeed and achieve your dance goals? Go into as much detail around these memories as you can.

Once you’ve compiled all your positive memories, bring in some imagination and creativity. Go back to your experiences as a young dancer and rewrite them in your memory with only the good. Erase the negative experiences from the paper and your memory. What would it have looked like if you only had positive, supportive experiences? How would you feel? Would your approach to auditions, company class, and casting be different?

Keep coming back to your new body story.

Since we’re hardwired for negativity, you’ll have to come back to your new, positive body story each and every day. Maybe you read it every morning or take it with you in a journal when you go to auditions. 

Confirm for yourself–the positive is your truth. You get to choose what you believe. Believe the good, and trust the people who encouraged you along the way. The naysayers are usually projecting their own pain and negativity onto you anyway. Forgive them and let them go–their pain is not your responsibility.

What if you don’t rewrite your story and take the negative feedback as fact?

This is when people quit, burn out, or lose their passion for dance. It’s why my career ended in my late 20’s instead of continuing until I was truly ready to say goodbye to ballet. 

The body negativity will tear you down if you let it—it might take months or years, depending on the situation.

Rewrite your story so you can see all the good you have to offer as a dancer, an artist, a human.

Interested in working with me to reach your body goals, find unshakeable body confidence, and rewrite your body story for good? Apply for Elite Best Body Coaching.

The post Rewrite Your Body Story appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

of X Contemporary Dance

Caitlin Elledge started X Contemporary Dance after struggling through her professional pursuits in ballet. The dance world tore her down but she got back up in a big way. Elledge now employs dancer’s of all shapes and sizes and celebrates them for their uniqueness. Every body can dance.

Share about your story in dance:

I grew up jumping from studio to studio in Southern Mississippi. At around age 3, I started dance because all 4 of my siblings were dancers (as well as my mother, aunt, grandmother, and great-grandmother). Dance runs in the family!

My main training was under the direction of Henry Danton (Royal Ballet/Sadler’s Wells), and Yvonne Bergeron (New Orleans Ballet), both of whom were very strict Vaganova instructors. I was very lucky and had the opportunity to travel to London for a week to train, as well as take master classes around the southern US from amazing teachers. 

As I got older, my passion grew, and so did I…

I ended up developing body dysmorphia and a binge eating disorder at the age of 12, but somehow continued on until age 16, which was when I was accepted into the Professional Training Division at Nashville Ballet.

My time at Nashville Ballet had its ups and downs, but was overall the greatest thing for my career. After 2 years in PTD, I was accepted into the Second Company (NB2), as well as Cincinnati Ballet 2, and a scholarship to both summer intensives. 

I was 18 at the time, and thought I had all I could want. I was moving up in a company, had performed amazing roles while in PTD, etc. Unfortunately, my time in NB2 was cut short due to undiagnosed Bipolar 2, depression, anxiety, and an eating disorder. 

I started coming home from dance with more and more leftover food until I just stopped packing lunch altogether. If one thing went wrong in class, I would completely unravel. I experienced dissociation almost constantly, and didn’t know how to cope with it. 

I left NB2 halfway through my first season and could no longer see a future in dance.

After all that had happened, I decided to take a year to focus on myself. I took class when I could, choreographed pieces to perform at a few studios back home, and even had the opportunity to choreograph for VUPointe Ballet at Vanderbilt University. 

Things were looking up, but I still had this idea that I wasn’t good enough, regardless of how hard I worked. In the fall of 2018, I was hospitalized for attempted suicide and finally got the help I needed. 

Dance came back naturally after the hospital, and my desire for it completely changed. I joined Blue Moves Modern Dance, continued freelance work, and began teaching regularly.

Now it’s 2020, and I have my own dance company. I never thought I would say that, I still struggle with my body image, but I think this new body suits me much better and I am stronger than I ever was before. My dance story is just beginning, and I hope it never ends.

What inspired you to start X-Contemporary Dance?

I just felt like I always needed a space to just dance and be safe, and I wanted that for other people. I was tired of not feeling good enough and being told I wasn’t enough, and it was painful for me to see my beautiful friends go through the same thing.

What kind of dancer’s do you hire?

I hire all types of dancers as long as they have solid technique. Any height, body type, race, or gender. I also really love artistry! Being expressive is the most important thing to me, and I’m happy to say that all of the artists in XCD have amazing expression in their movement. 

There is nothing more beautiful than seeing dancers do the same choreography in their own personality. It’s like looking at a sky full of fireworks- they all do the same thing, but not a single one looks the same!

What conversations do you hope to open up in the dance world? How?

There are quite a few conversations I would LOVE to open up in the dance world:

1. That every BODY can dance and that it’s okay to be different. I believe XCD definitely shows that, especially in the work we’re creating.

2. Mental health and physical health go hand-in-hand. It’s okay to talk about what you’re going through, and it’s okay if you need a break. The dynamic in XCD is different than any other company, and I hope others will learn from that. If you allow dancers to rest, better work is created. If you allow dancers to be themselves and make an environment that is free from competition, better work is created.

3. BODY SHAMING, SEXUAL HARASSMENT, SEXISM, AND RACISM ARE REAL IN THE DANCE WORLD AND NEEDS TO BE DISCUSSED! I cannot shout that any louder to the rooftops. This is something that HAS to change, and I will not rest until it has.

What has been the most surprising part of running a company?

The most surprising part of running a company is how natural it feels. I love the dancers so much and am so happy to walk into that studio and create on them. It feels like something that I was always meant to do, and I am so incredibly happy to be alive, healthy, and able to do it.

Anything else you’d like to share:

I have been wrong my entire life. Dance is so much more than bodies. It is so much more than perfecting technique. So much more than trying to impress others and constantly trying to get ahead. 

It’s beauty and strength in its rawest form…color and texture, sound and movement…explosive and powerful and overall incredible. Not one individual person is the same, and the art form accentuates that in the most beautiful way possible.

Learn more about X-Contemporary Dance and Donate here.

Photo Credits (in order of appearance):

Caitlin Elledge by Martin O’Connor Photography

Caitlin Elledge by Alicia Hernandez (C.C.Images)

Justin Savage

Marie Williams by Christina Joy Fideler (photographer)

Layne Porter by Martin O’Connor Photography

The post A company for every BODY… appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

Through The Whole Dancer, I work with dancer’s to reach your personal best body healthfully and sustainably. I use a 7-Step Process that has worked time and time again to support dancer’s in reaching body goals. Does it happen overnight? No. But with focus and attention you can make major shifts in just a few months.

Here are the steps so you can start to work in the direction of positive body change on your own. If you’d like to dive in a bit deeper with me, sign up to receive the FREE 7 step best body guide where I break down this process and help you see how you can apply it now!

STEP 1: LEARN THE BASICS OF HEALTHY EATING

You’ve got to have a healthy foundation. Learn about macronutrients (proteins, carbs + fats) and micronutrients (vitamins + minerals) so you can easily put together complete and satisfying meals.

Do research for yourself – stick to learning nutritional science information and seek knowledge on fueling athletes. Be aware that a lot of nutrition information is biased. Look for evidence based research and studies conducted using athletes or dancers.

STEP 2: ADOPT A PRACTICE IN SELF LOVE

Taking good care of yourself through self-care practices is one of the best ways to cultivate self-love. You’re communicating to your body through your actions that you are worthy of time and care.

When you look in the mirror, frame your self-descriptions in a positive way and always look for what’s good. Don’t criticize yourself harshly. Work on getting that little voice in your head to speak kindly to you.

STEP 3: PRIORITIZE MEAL PLANNING AND PREPARATION

Eating healthy, delicious meals is very possible. It does typically take a little bit of planning and preparation. Find the healthy recipes you truly enjoy eating. Seek out options that are quick to cook or easy to heat up and make them ahead.

Have staple recipes that you make every week. Switch them up when you get bored. If you’re not excited to eat something it will be less satisfying. You’ve got to find satisfaction from your food if you want to stay on the healthy track.

If your healthy recipes are bland and boring (they don’t have to be) you’ll be more likely to binge on unhealthy foods.

STEP 4: FIND THE EATING PLAN THAT WORKS FOR YOU

Not all foods work for all people. It’s important to experiment to figure out what works for you. Just because your friend has found success on a Vegan or Paleo diet doesn’t mean you will.

It’s also very supportive from a mindset perspective to realize that you don’t have to fit your eating style into a box. You can (and arguably should) shift your choices around food as needed.

Signs you might need to make some shifts: you’re breaking out a lot/more than usual, you’re feeling lethargic or wired, you’re gaining weight inexplicably, you’re losing weight inexplicably, you find yourself binge eating or emotional eating (these are emotional/mindset concerns but your food choices can impact them or be impacted by them).

STEP 5: CULTIVATE CONFIDENCE

Each and every day, think about all of your gifts. What positive light do you bring to the world as a person and dancer? How can you lift up those around you?

When you step into the studio and watch the other dancer’s, admire them for their strengths. The more you see the gifts of those around you, the more easily you’ll identify those gifts in yourself.

STEP 6: DISCOVER SMART, TARGETED CROSS TRAINING

Cross – training shouldn’t take hours a day and it shouldn’t be exhausting. If you destroy yourself at the gym you won’t be able to bring yourself fully into your dancing.

A lot of dancer’s are turning to weight training for good reason. It can benefit you even if you’re only spending 20-30 minutes in the gym a few days a week. Check out The New Rules of Cross-Training for Dancer’s by Annelise Bryan here.

STEP 7: END RESTRICTION AND A RESTRICTIVE MINDSET

If you’ve gotten to a place where you simply aren’t eating enough or you think you must eat less to reach your body goals, it’s time to adjust.

Depending on how deeply you’ve gotten into restriction you might need eating disorder counseling or support. Find a counselor or psychologist who works specifically with dancer’s.

If your mindset is only somewhat skewed at this point, adjust how you’re looking at food. Food is not “good” or “bad” and you shouldn’t let your food choices impact how you feel about yourself.

It’s not about self control.

It’s about fueling yourself with enough food that is healthy and enjoyable so that you can easily move towards your body goals.

If you’d like to learn the 7-step process to reaching your body goals in more depth, grab my free Best Body Guide. That’s a great place to start!

Photo by Content Pixie on Unsplash

The post The 7-Step Process to Reaching Best Body Goals appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

When I danced for BalletFleming, I did a lot of admin work including screening the audition emails before I sent them to the Artistic Director. You would be AMAZED the number of people who could not write a clear, concise email to request an audition.

I was very lucky to learn the importance of a well-written email early on in high school. The only way to communicate with teachers in cyber school was via email. Our onsite academic director taught us how to email the teachers: be clear with what we were asking, and be respectful even if you were super mad they had not graded a paper you handed in a month ago. We also had career workshops where we learned how to write resumes, cover letters, make audition reels, search for auditions, and apply to colleges.

Everyone should know how to construct a well-written cover letter or e-mail so here are a few tips:

1. Have a header that you can put on all of your audition materials. It’s like fancy stationary, but for all of your online audition materials. It doesn’t have to be anything crazy or elaborate. Though make sure it’s in a font that can be easily read. Make sure the header includes your name, email address, phone number, and physical address.

2. Check each company’s website to see who you should be addressing the letter to. It takes five minutes to check the name of the Artistic Director. No one likes receiving emails that say To Whom It May Concern.

3. Start the letter by stating you would like to audition for the company, what position you’re auditioning for, and how you would like to audition. Also include why you want to dance for this company. This is your opportunity to show you’ve done your research.

4. Talk about yourself! In the next paragraph, brag about yourself. Do a short summary of who you are as a dancer: where you’ve trained, what companies and choreographers you’ve worked with, etc.

5. Include a list of items that are attached to the email or in the package if you mail your materials. This way the artistic staff knows what you’re sending them. In this paragraph include any Youtube or website links you would like the artistic staff to view.

6. For the final paragraph, have a respectful sign off. Thank the artistic staff for reviewing your materials and you look forward to hearing from them.

7. This doesn’t have to be a long letter. Companies get bombarded with audition materials. Keep your letter short and to the point, one page maximum.

8. SPELLCHECK! This should be a given, but triple check a million times. Have a few friends or family read your letter and other audition materials over to check for mistakes. Mistakes can make your overall work ethic look sloppy.

Keep these tips in mind while writing your audition cover letter/email.  May the odds ever be in your favor for your upcoming auditions.

LOOKING FOR SUPPORT ON YOUR AUDITION JOURNEY?

Photo on Visualhunt

The post 8 – Tips for a better ballet audition cover letter appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

My mom gave me this book when I was in my early teens. She trusted it because it was written by a well known ballet star. When I read some of it aloud on Christmas morning she said, “hey wait, give that back!” in horror.

I convinced her to let me keep it and I was strongly influenced by the unhealthy suggestions it offered.

Today, lets tackle this idea that “self – control” is the necessary component to attaining the “ideal” dancers body.

Firstly, the concept of self – control is arguably the #1 contributing factor that makes people feel totally deprived on any eating plan.

You might relate to the feeling that if you can just stay in control of what you put into your mouth you’ll attain the perfect body, be a better dancer and have greater potential for success.

However, modern food research shows us that you actually crave foods because you’re deficient in specific nutrients.

So, the biggest risk with a restrictive diet is that you’re not getting enough nutrients which is leading you to crave unhealthy or processed foods. Not to mention the effects of deficiency on your immune system, your ability to build muscle and maintain strong bones.

Even if you manage to stay “in control” for some time, restrictive eating plans tend to either backfire with major weight gain or result in serious health issues. It’s also worth noting: the desire for control is a cornerstone of anorexia.

This book was published in 1984 when dieting was a whole different world and I think Allegra Kent was writing about the things that were popular at the time that even doctors promoted: low calorie, low fat diets with self – control as the number one factor in all of it.

I also think her goal was to be helpful so this is in no way a personal attack. She and her friends had clearly figured out a way to attain the ideal ballet bodies but now we know that being thin without proper nutrition can lead to injury, shorten your career or even your life.

I don’t suggest you pick up this book for modern, sound advice. I plan to rewrite it entirely but for now, this will be a series I’ll share over the coming weeks because I think a lot of the food myths in The Dancers’ Body Book still persist in the dance world.

I have distinct memories of conversations with friends that occurred in the not so distant past where we said if we could just eat less, we’d have the bodies we desire and all our problems would be solved.

If you’re caught up in this self – control idea as I know I was, it is important to work on your mind – set. And this can be a long journey.

Start by reminding yourself daily that to dance professionally, this body of yours needs to function at its peek. Restriction will not get you there.

Try this mantra (I love a good mantra):

“My body allows me to dance. I will fuel it healthfully and sufficiently without restriction or deprivation.”

Bottom line:

Self – control and eating less is not the answer. 

The post The Dancers’ Body Book – Part 1 appeared first on The Whole Dancer.