with Olivia Mackinnon

New York City Ballet Dancer and Ballet Inspired Fitness creator Olivia Mackinnon shares how she is staying healthy at home during quarantine. Balance is key as well as recognizing that staying in performance shape isn’t necessarily realistic. Read on for some inspiration!

Of course there are some things we’re all collectively experiencing but what have been the most major life changes for you?

I’ve had to adapt to this new normal of not being able to dance with my company. This pandemic has allowed me to take a breath from my normal lifestyle I’ve had since I was 17. I’ve made many new relationships virtually, and discovered a new love for teaching, and creating.

How are you staying positive and motivated dancing at home? 

Having the ability to still connect with my colleagues each morning by taking class through zoom has helped continue my training, and keeps a consistent schedule each day for myself. I’m also able to see my pilates teacher each week. We work through ways of staying at my best even under the circumstances.

Have you made any adjustments to your meal plan? Any favorite quarantine meals or snacks?

Because I’m not pushing myself to the limits onstage, I’ve adjusted my afternoon regime by not eating as much throughout the day. I started making smoothies around 1:30-2:00pm filled with greens, collagen protein, and flaxseed to keep myself full until an early dinner.

As a performing artist I’m used to eating a light protein filled snack before the show, and then a large meal after performing late at night once I’m home. I’ve been enjoying this treat of eating dinner early, and retiring to bed at a decent time!

Are you coping with any anxiety or more challenging emotions? What are you doing to work through them?

I’ve grown so accustomed to my demanding schedule, and I have that type of personality that thrives off of staying busy, and fulfilled by work. As an athlete who’s career can go by quickly, it’s been difficult to have it put on hold for a year.

Instead of continuing to feel sad, I’ve tried to make my weeks filled with classes. Training for myself as well as teaching and helping others has helped.

Are you worried about staying in shape? What would you say to dancers who are concerned about losing technique or “getting out of shape”?

I have to remind myself that there is no way to stay in perfect performance shape without performing. However, there are so many other things I can do to keep myself in top form. On top of taking classes, and seeing my pilates teacher I’ve loved swimming!

I also launched Ballet Inspired Fitness in April. I’ve created classes for all levels that lengthen and tone the muscles. Teaching ballet privates, and group classes as well as teaching/creating my Ballet Inspired fitness has really kept me going.

Will you share about Ballet Inspired Fitness?

Once I started teaching ballet class privates I realized there was a need for a more inclusive way of exercising with a graceful quality.

There were so many ballet classes being provided online, but not many ways to help dancers condition their bodies in a way that translates into improving their everyday ballet class. I also wanted to make sure those who have never taken ballet were included, and that they would have the opportunity to learn positions and movements from the ballet vocabulary while moving their bodies.

All of the exercises elongate the body promoting long lines kindred to those of a ballerina. I started by teaching livestream classes on my instagram @oliviamackinnon and then transitioned to teaching Zoom based classes to build my clientele.

The Zoom classes provide my clients with more personalized attention, and it’s a fun way to meet and connect with new people from all around the world.

The goal is to have clients subscribe to gain access to a full library of classes. That way they can stream anytime, anywhere! I’ve also created tutorials explaining certain ballet movements you might see in my fitness classes. I want to make sure people understand how to perform them.

Follow Olivia Mackinnon on Instagram!.

Photos of Olivia by James Jin and Gabriela Celeste

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Chamonix Bas

Where do you dance? Share a bit about your journey in dance.

My journey in dance has been somewhat unconventional. I grew up doing competitive swimming, but unfortunately I quit when I was 11 because my parents, who both worked full-time, were unable to get me to the more advanced swim team practices. They still wanted me to do an extra-curricular activity though, and since my mom was interested in starting adult ballet, I started taking lessons once a week at the same studio.

Since our family didn’t have much experience with the world of dance, the studio I started at seemed great, but as I got older and started attending summer intensive auditions, we quickly realized that it did not provide the quality of training I was looking for.

I am SO fortunate because right around the time I decided to change ballet schools, my mom was also able to start working from home. This allowed her the flexibility to be available to drive me to ballet at any time and start homeschooling me, especially since I didn’t have the skills to move away to a dance school with housing.

I started dancing at Southland Ballet Academy in California when I was 14, and have trained there for 2 years.

What’s a challenge you faced in pursuing dance professionally? How did you overcome it?

I’m not a professional dancer yet, but starting so late with poor training has been one of the hardest challenges. Sometimes it’s hard not to compare myself with people my age who have had excellent training since they were three, but I have to remind myself that everyone blooms at a different time. Some dancers are ready to go professional after high school, but others are ready in their 20’s.

Even through dance is challenging, I love how there is always so much room to constantly grow and improve, and I do think being a late-starter has some perks. I feel that I have a greater appreciation for dance since it hasn’t always been a part of my life.

What does it mean to you to be a “whole” dancer?

To me, being a whole dancer means being a person first and a dancer second. I think it is especially important to find your own worth as a human being, and not just a dancer.

Of course, as dancers, we spend a majority of time dancing or doing other dance-related activities, but I think it’s necessary to cultivate other areas of our lives as well and recognize what we excel at. Not only can this prevent burnout, but also give us a fresh perspective when we approach dance.

Do you have any special self-care rituals that help you feel balanced?

Some of my favorite self-care rituals include soaking in Epsom salts, reading, and cooking while watching an interesting movie. I especially like cooking because it allows me to do something relaxing and creative, and also allows me to have some great, healthy food available during the week when I don’t have time to cook!

What role does cross-training play in your life?

I’m still figuring out cross-training. I used to do the elliptical or swim for a few hours a week, which I think was a little extreme in addition to my dance schedule. I also tried pilates at a studio for a year, which did get expensive.

Now, I mainly walk my dog every day, do specific pilates/floor barre exercises I need for strength at home (there are SO many great exercises that don’t require a reformer or special equipment!), and sometimes do another form of cardio.

How do you keep a positive relationship with food and your body in the face of aesthetic pressure in dance?

I think this question goes back to the concept of finding my worth as a person rather than just a dancer as well as creating balance in my life. Even though aesthetic pressure is a real problem in the dance world, finding things I like about my body as opposed to picking it apart, and focusing on technique rather than how I look in the mirror really helps.

There are consequences to abusing your body. Realizing that my primary goal is to be the best, strongest, and healthiest dancer I can be rather than the smallest, and possibly not-as-great dancer makes me want to take good care of the body I have.

Do you have a favorite recipe to share?

When I was younger, I thought all salads were boring and unsatisfying, but I have really discovered a love for them after I learned how great then can be with the right ingredients! Having a great dressing, some more filling ingredients, and your favorite combination of vegetables can make a salad exciting.

Here is the recipe for my favorite salad and dressing combination.

Find Chamonix on Instagram @aballerinasfood

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Lauren Fadeley

Where do you dance?

Principal Soloist with Miami City Ballet

Share a bit about your journey in dance…

MCB is the third company I’ve danced with. Originally from Orlando, FL, I moved to NYC at age 15 to train at SAB. A year later I was asked to join New York City Ballet, where I danced for 2 years. That was a little too much for me too soon, so at 18 I choose to go to college at Indiana University. I graduated with a BS in Ballet Performance with an outside field in Kinesiology. From there I joined Pennsylvania Ballet, where I danced for 9 seasons and became a principal dancer.

What’s a challenge you’ve faced in pursuing dance professionally?

My body and being “in shape”. I am naturally very broad and muscular and when I’m not dancing a lot, I don’t always fit the ballerina body aesthetic. I got my first “fat talk” when I was 15 and my most recent when I was 32, so has always been a struggle.

How did you overcome it?

I never fully overcame it, but have tried to find balance and peace with my body. When I was younger, I resorted to unhealthy means to try to achieve the “perfect” body, but after breaking my foot I realized how unsustainable that was.

Studying nutrition, anatomy and physiology in college helped me gain a better understanding and as I get older in this career, I never take my body for granted. During long lay offs, I just have to be more aware of how I’m fueling myself and stay active even if not dancing everyday.

What does it mean to you to be a “whole” dancer?

To be strong and confident. Though I will never look as thin as most of the other dancers onstage, I take pride in my strength and power that come across in my performances.

Do you have any special self-care rituals that help you feel balanced?

Yoga and gyrotonics are both good for my mind, body and soul and I try to fit them in once a week. I also love unwinding with a face mask and essential oil diffuser.

What role does cross-training play in your life?

Cross-training as become even more important to me at this stage of my career than ever. Pilates and weight training have helped with injury prevention and cardio to keep my stamina up for shows. When on lay offs, I try to change up what I do everyday to not get in a rut and stay motivated.

How do you keep a positive relationship with food and your body in the face of aesthetic pressure in dance?

It is very difficult and some days are harder than others. Staring at a mirror 6 hours a day can do numbers on how you perceive yourself, but I try to remember how fortunate I am that I have a strong body that enables me to dance and do what I love. With food, I try to think of it as the fuel needed to perform and how it makes my body feel.

Photo Credits:

Dances at a Gathering by Daniel Azouley

The Four Temperaments by Alexander Iziliaev

Diamonds by April Singleton

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Alston McGill

Where do you dance? Share a bit about your journey in dance.

I am currently a corps de ballet member with New York City Ballet. I began dancing at age three in Savannah, Georgia. My long time ballet teacher in Savannah, Veronica Niebuhr, was like a second mother to me, and she fostered my dedication to and love for ballet. When I was 12, she encouraged me and my family to consider pre-professional ballet boarding programs, especially if I wanted to be a professional ballet dancer.

Knowing my love for ballet, my parents were incredibly supportive, and I went to the Rock School for Dance Education in Philadelphia for one year. From there, I moved to New York and attended the School of American Ballet. I trained at SAB for four years. I was planning on returning to the school for my fifth and final year when I was invited to join New York City Ballet, and I have now been there for four years.

What’s a challenge you’ve faced in pursuing dance professionally? How did you overcome it?

Being a professional dancer is challenging on many different levels, but performing New York City Ballet’s repertory is so gratifying that any challenges are worth it. Injuries, unfortunately, are something most professional dancers have to deal with at one point or another during a career.

There is nothing worse than being unable to move and perform. I had a back injury two years after joining the company. I was unable to perform for 10 months, and after that time I still had to ease back into the company’s workload over another several months.

Only now, almost two years later, do I feel like I am able to really push my body again. During the time I was injured, not only did I have to diligently do my physical therapy exercises, but I also had to stay strong mentally. I had to find ways to keep myself engaged and positive during what felt like a very negative situation.

I focused on my small goals in recovery. I tried not to put pressure on a perfect timeline and rejoiced in every small step forward, like walking down the street without nerve symptoms or mastering a new stabilization exercise. I also had a wonderful support network of friends and family around me to make sure I never felt alone during the recovery process.

What does it mean to you to be a “whole” dancer?

To me, being a “whole” dancer means that I am a “whole” person. I am not only a ballet dancer, but I am working to create a full life and a balanced sense of self. Outside of ballet, I attend academic classes at Columbia, and I enjoy my social relationships with friends, some of whom are dancers and others who are not.

I think these things are so wonderful for mental health and allow me to bring a clear mind into the studio. Being a “whole” dancer also means that I take care of my body. I have Pilates privates, I see the company’s physical and massage therapists daily, and I make sure to do my daily regimen of physical therapy exercises that keep my back and body healthy.   

Do you have any special self-care rituals that help you feel balanced?

I love having a relaxing night at home to help me feel balanced and rested. I’ll start with an Epsom salt bath then lie on my acupressure mat, which always makes me fall asleep. After, I’ll do deep breathing and stabilization exercises on my Parasetter, and I’ll end my night by reading before bed.

What role does cross-training play in your life?

Cross training is so important for me! My muscles don’t like to hold tone, so I’ll do New York City Ballet’s strength and conditioning program with one of our physical therapists whenever my rehearsal schedule allows. Regaining my stamina has also been important in recovering from my back injury, so I do stamina drills with another physical therapist every other day so that I can make it through tough roles.

How do you keep a positive relationship with food and your body in the face of aesthetic pressure in dance?

Although it is still tough every now and then, I think that I have found how to maintain a positive relationship with food and my body. The main way is by not comparing myself to other dancers. We are all different with different bodies!

Do you have a favorite healthy recipe?

I absolutely love this ponzu salmon recipe from Healthyish. It’s easy to throw together, and it’s always a crowd pleaser when I have people over for dinner. CLICK HERE to check out the recipe!

Photos of Alston:
Top Rachel Neville
Bottom Paul Kolnik

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As a native New Yorker, I was spoiled in my younger years. I had access to performances by some of the greatest dance companies and performers in the world. New York City Ballet has always held a special place in my heart and Deanna McBrearty is a dancer whose career I watched closely.

When a dancer you admire crosses your path in many ways – it feels like you know them. I got to watch Deanna not only in performances but also in the comfort of my living room via The New York City Ballet workout tapes and in Suki Shorer’s book on Balanchine technique.

Earlier this year I had the pleasure of connecting with her to chat about her new book Start with This and the many lessons she learned through her journey in dance. Start with This is part memoir, part field guide and will give you tons of “ah-ha” moments, whether you’re aspiring to dance professionally or you’re already in it. Her book will make you feel less alone (dancers have so many common experiences) and can support you in looking at things in a more positive light.

Check out my interview with Deanna here: 

In our chat Deanna shares so much wisdom – the kind that can only be found in a long career with a big company. Check out this interview, the advice is priceless.

You’ll find out how injury can actually help you get ahead and what is really necessary from the perspective of strategy and mindset to move you forward in dance.

Like most great dance stories, Deanna’s had ups and downs that shaped her into the artist and person she became. Are you ready for some inspiration? Check out the interview!

If you’d like to learn more about Deanna, visit her website. To purchase her book – click here!

The post NYC Ballet Dancer Deanna McBrearty Shares Dance Career Lessons appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

“I know you’ve lost weight, but I need you to lose more.”

Took me a minute to process this statement.

Wait a minute, what?

As these words sank in, I thought, “I’ve been working so hard and trying to fit into what you need, and obviously it isn’t good enough.”

I thought, “Okay, time to do more.  There’s obviously something wrong with me still.”

I can imagine that moment vividly to this day.

It was 1988-1989, I was between junior and senior years in an all-girls Catholic high school. I was training to dance in a variety show at this resort called Pacific Islands Club, on a tiny little island that most people don’t know, a U.S. Territory called Guam.

Dance opportunities were scarce so I wanted to take advantage of what I could. The choreographer, who I’ll call Lisa, pulled me aside and expressed her concerns about my weight.

As you can see, those words had stuck with me for a long time. Isn’t it incredible the power of a few letters, a few statements?

Dance is interesting in that it gives you this awesome freedom and platform for expression, but dance can trap you into thinking you’re not enough based on other’s standards…if you let it.

That’s where I found myself for many years.

Experiencing this throughout college when I continued studying dance, the words other people said, and more importantly, the words I said to myself, surrounding my physical appearance and food dictating how I would show up.

Food.

Today I call it a blessing. I also refer to food as nourishment, sustenance, energy, and healing power. Back then, I labeled food as good, bad, healthy, unhealthy, a temptation, a reward, etc.

My relationship with food was two-fold. Food was my foe, but at the same time, it was also my “faithful” friend. The epitome of  Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and I couldn’t predict who would rear their head out when food and I were standing face to face.

I had lots of anxiety surrounding food. Food appeared as the enemy waiting to attack me at my weakest moments, which I felt weak most of the time, and I didn’t want to fight so, I succumbed. Because it was easier to give into something that was a temporary comfort than face what was going internally head on.

On the flip side, food was also my friend. Food was there for me when harsh words were spoken over me. Food was my companion when I was lonely. Food was my partner when I needed a mindless tv show watching buddy.

When I quit dance for over 20+ years after getting my dance degree, this was part of it. My tumultuous relationship with food and how I viewed myself as a dancer. I allowed the deeper issues that I had, which I wasn’t aware of at the time, determine my descent from the thing I loved.

As my health and inner resolve declined, I found myself going back and forth, overwhelmed and confused with all that goes on in our culture surrounding food, health, and exercise.

The trends touting certain diets, food, exercise, was all too much and when things didn’t work, I found myself reverting back to the harsh words and moments that I experienced all too often regarding my weight and other aspects of my physical appearance.

Year 2014.

The internal turmoil was about to burst. I had enough of allowing other’s opinions affect the way I viewed myself. I hated how I felt physically, and I missed dancing.

So, I returned to dance after a 20+ year hiatus, and started my quest to regain a healthier disposition, mentally and physically.

My first step was to start moving by getting back into class. In the process, I started experimenting with modified versions of different eating styles…low-carb, no-carb, etc.

I knew this would be a process because I had to overcome years of self-sabotage and I am so thankful I allowed myself space, time and compassion to go through this process. Slowly but surely I started seeing results.

Then it struck me, I still had to deal with the internal issues surrounding how food affected my self-image. When I started looking at food as I had mentioned previously, nourishment, sustenance, energy, and healing power, that’s when things started changing dramatically.

I stopped having “cheat” days because I didn’t want to refer to food as cheating.

An apple after dance class was a delightful energy replacement, not a sugar-laden item that was going to make me fatter. I wasn’t a “bad person” because I wanted rice or potatoes because carbs are “bad.”

In retrospect, there were two mindset shifts that I had to reassess in my approach to getting holistically healthy for dance (and everything else):                                               

1.     The scarcity mindset.

Before, I would eat food in front of me like there was no tomorrow. Like I would never have a chance to have that decadent delight of chocolate goodness.

Little did I realize at the time that I was ignoring my internal hunger for something deeper, which resulted in multiple combo meals at the local taco shop and almost nightly trips to the specialty chocolate store.

2.     The comparison mindset.

I had to stop comparing my body and my journey to other dancers and start being grateful that I had all faculties and senses to move and experience this wonderful art we call dance.

In summary, I invite you to consider the following to change your words and approaches to health as a dancer. They can be life changing as they were for me.

1. Proper mindset.  Health as a dancer is more than how many classes you take and if you nail multiple pirouettes.
2. Gratitude for what you can do.
3. Stopping destructive thoughts and words of what your body cannot do.  Just because your arabesque doesn’t look like Sylvie Guillem’s doesn’t make you less of a dancer or more importantly, a human being.
4. Being mindful that health is so individual and no one way works the same for everyone.
5. Having patience and being adjustable to change as your dance journey continues.
6. Be open to cross training in other movement styles and exercises. This was a huge game changer for me as well.
7. Remembering that you’re valuable as you are, right at this very moment, regardless of your body type, what food you eat or don’t eat, what dance style you do, or what latest production you’ve been cast for.

About Annett:

Annett Bone is the creator and host of The DancePreneuring Studio podcast where she guides her listeners on a journey of transformation inspired by dance, life, and business. The podcast is a reflection of her personal adventure overcoming her fears and returning to her passion for dance after a 20 year hiatus, the lessons that she has learned along the way, and proving that it’s never too late to be great.  You can connect with her at AnnettBone.com and follow her @annettbone on Instagram.

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When I was young, I was a free spirit, known by the nicknames “tigger” (the bouncy, excitable character from Winnie the Pooh)  or “la salvage” which means “the wild one” in Italian… I think there was a theme going out that emphasized the freedom I felt.

But I was also determined, competitive and had perfectionist traits from an early age and these traits became a vulnerability.

I began dancing quite late into my life, I was 9, which when compared to girls who were dressed in ballet slippers at aged 3, it made me worry and stress over the technique and time I had to ‘make up’. I danced at my local village hall dance school, only a few minutes away from my family home in Burghfield Common.

It wasn’t a special school but just a school for those that loved to dance, however my natural talent stood out to my dance teacher and so she sent me off to audition for The Royal Ballet just after my 11th birthday. At age 11 I was accepted into The Royal ballet school MA’s and my passion for dance was flying. When I lost my place at the school two years later, I felt crushed.

At the time, I was hitting puberty and my body had changed a lot. This made me believe that it was my physique that stole me off my place which made me hate my body. The body I once loved, the body I was once proud of, I had turned against and disowned.

The post Always Margi – from Ballet to Anorexia and Back Again appeared first on The Whole Dancer.

Allison’s Story

The path…

My mom was a professional ballet dancer and I started dancing at her ballet school when I was really young. When I was 13, I began training at the Rock School for Dance Education as a full-time student. My family lives outside of Philadelphia, so I was commuting there on the train everyday.

When I was 15, I accepted an amazing opportunity to be part of the inaugural year of Cary Ballet Conservatory’s Professional Training Program. I relocated to North Carolina on my own and boarded there for a couple of years so I could attend.

Food and stuff…

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She spent a lot of time learning about nutrition in order to craft the best possible eating plan for her personal needs. She even consulted with a nutritionist to make sure she was eating enough of the right foods for her dance schedule.

Interested in checking out how Natasha approaches food? Watch our chat here:

You can find Natasha on instagram @tippytoegirl and you can find more recipe inspiration from her on her blog tippytoegirl.com

Want to attend the next dancer interview live? Join The Whole Dancer – Ballet Dancer Health Facebook group and you’ll get all the invites!

Natasha was kind enough to share a recipe with us! This one, she says, is a favorite of her co-workers at San Francisco Ballet.

BANANA BREAD BALLS

Ingredients:

2 cups sprouted walnuts

1 ripe banana

1/4 cup coconut butter

1 Tbs cashew butter

1/4 cup coconut flour

1/4 tsp ashwagandha

1/4 tsp rhodiola

a couple splashes of vanilla extract

a few shakes of pumpkin spice (+ extra for rolling)

Method:

Mix all ingredients together, and roll balls in pumpkin spice. freeze & that’s all.

Give this recipe a try and let us know how it comes out!

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Hi dancers! My name is Jackie Bologna and I am beyond excited to write a post for a platform as special as the Whole Dancer.  It is so vital to find communities that encourage you and share tips to make your training and career a positive experience and I truly believe that Jess is cultivating that with the Whole Dancer.

I am about to finish my third year in the Corps at New York City Ballet and I can finally say that I have found my own mental clarity and balance this year.  The jump from the school to company life was challenging in so many unexpected ways.

When I received my apprenticeship I was 17 years old and still living in the dorms at The School of American Ballet.  During my first couple of years in the company I had a lot of ups and downs.

Early in my first year in the corps I had to deal with my first serious injury.

Maybe the most challenging was figuring out how to navigate rest and cross training with our long and difficult hours, and probably the most important step for me was learning how to mentally adjust to the stress of what is expected of you in company life.

Up until this year I let the stress of trying to look perfect for the stage really negatively affect my life.  I was not in a good place mentally or physically and I found myself focusing on everything that was wrong in my life.  It was draining and exhausting in many ways and I constantly felt like a failure.

Although there were times when I wondered if I needed a drastic change in my life, like a break from dance, I never truly considered it a real option.

I started off the year reaching out to Jess and signing up for The Whole Dancer Program, which really set the ball rolling for some important changes that I didn’t even know I needed to make. After talking to Jess and doing a little bit of soul searching, something shifted by the time Nutcracker rolled around in the Fall.

I had also just spent a few weeks off at home with my family and my niece was born.  I started going to church again and rekindling my relationship with God.  I realized how lucky I was to have a healthy and loving family and that if nothing else I should be happy for that reason.

I started writing down things I was grateful for every morning when our season started again and I realized that it made a huge difference in how I viewed my day and myself.  In fact, I started to think less about myself, and more about what a gift it was to be in the room with the extremely talented artists I work with every day.

Taking the focus away from my internal struggles gave me the clarity I needed to remember how much I truly LOVE performing. 

It was also around Nutcracker that I started listening to the Bulletproof Podcast.  Obviously, even though I let go of the negativity I had towards my body, there is always room to improve.  This podcast was a new way of approaching nutrition that made complete sense to me and sparked a deep interest that I never knew I had.  I started thinking about my body in terms of health and prevention instead of just outward appearances.

It made me aware of the quality of my food and the more I learned, the more information I wanted.  It’s now a secret passion of mine and I recommend the book Deep Nutrition by Dr. Catherine Shanahan to anyone who will listen!

I’ve also taken allergy tests so I know what my body is sensitive to.  Obviously no one can eat perfectly all the time but I now try to stay away from anything that is processed or has too much sugar or vegetable oil.  Those are the three biggest things I’ve learned to avoid.

I’ve also become obsessed with my biweekly strength training sessions. 

When I look back over this past few years I realize how much I’ve learned and I feel ready to tackle whatever the rest of my dance career has to throw at me. Some of the things I’ve learned and would share with you if you’re just starting your dance career are to work hard and work quietly, know your understudy roles to the best of your ability, and really try your best to enjoy the little things when you can because it does go by way faster than you think it will.

When you first get into a company people will notice your work ethic and the way you present yourself. One way to really test that is by going out of your way to know the ballets you understudy. You never know when the ballet master will need you to step in and there is nothing worse than feeling unprepared. It can actually be extremely rewarding and thrilling to go on last minute, but only if you’re not scared to forget the steps!

Every time you go onstage it’s a chance to improve and have fun trying out new aspects of your artistry. It’s hard to remember that when you’re tired or hurting or just in a bad mood, but I sometimes take a minute in the wings to remind myself that it won’t last forever.

It truly is a fleeting career so I tell myself to make it good while it lasts, no matter my circumstances.

I realize how much I’ve learned and I feel ready to tackle whatever the rest of my dance career will throw at me.  In many ways I am very happy that I’ve had some good learning experiences and struggles early on in my time in the company.

I believe it’s the lessons I’ve learned after experiencing the hard times that have helped me find what it is to be a “Whole Dancer”.

This past spring and summer I’ve felt more joy during performances than any other time in my life.  It is a complete connection between mind, body, and soul that is hard to describe in words.  I am constantly aware of what a blessing it is to be a part of my dream company and get a chance to be included in some of the best ballets in the world.

For me, being a “Whole Dancer” means opening your eyes to how good you have it and trying your best to learn from your hardships.  It means focusing on the relationships and community around you, and supporting your friends because only you can understand what they’re going through.

It’s easy to let ballet become your “end all be all”, but in my experience you’ll love it a lot more if you let it be what it really is; an incredibly beautiful and disciplined art form. Ballet is a very prominent part of my life, and I believe finding joy in other areas outside of the studios is one of the best ways to enhance it and become a “Whole Dancer” and maybe even more importantly, a balanced person.

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